Bloom (Five Minute Friday)

I've had this post in my head since the word was released last Friday, actually. My kids are away, so I have had to space things out to keep myself from being completely crazy while they're gone. 15 days is a LONG, LONG time for this mom to not see her girls.

Today as I write, I've had my kiddos on my heart extra. And it seems fitting that what cam to mind with the prompt is something that instantly brings my girls to mind.

This week, we're writing on BLOOM.  And linking with Lisa-Jo and the Five Minute Friday crowd over here.

BLOOM

My girls both learned about acrostics this year in school. S in particular has become very fond of them. So when I saw this prompt and wanted to write about how I can encourage my girls to bloom - to grow into themselves - it seemed an acrostic would work. Now I can show S I really was "thinkity-think-thinking" about her while she was away.

B

believe in them.   The first step to my kids growing into what they can be is for this mama to believe in them - and remind them that I do.

L

listen to them   Sometimes kids don't want, or even need, advice. But they always need someone to listen. A safe zone to share their ideas. A sounding board.

O

offer encouragement    Failures will come. Successes will come. In the presence of both, I want to always be my girls' biggest cheerleader.

O

offer grace    Mistakes happen. Poor decisions get made.  While discipline is needed, depending on the circumstance, often the consequences that already present are punishment enough. I have had many a day where i needed grace. And I want my girls to learn to give grace freely. To learn how to forgive. Even when it is hard, even when it hurts. It's not easy. Grace never is (at least for me). But is ALWAYS worth it. Looking back, I cannot think of one single time when I chose grace and I wish I hadn't.

M

make time to spend with them   This is so important to me. It's not just about being a cheerleader or loving them. It's about being intentional to spend time with them. To let them see the rest of this up close and personal. To know that they are a priority, and that their mom always will choose them. That they matter enough to get my time now. So when they leave, they will feel safe knowing that whenever they return, mom is still right here waiting.

Stop.

Belong (Five Minute Friday)

Welcome to Five Minute Friday (which I celebrate on any day I make time to write!. The rules for how it works are simple:

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking. (On your own blog or in the comments here).
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..

And so here are my 5 minutes on
BELONG

I have been gifted with an amazing woman for a (ex)-mother-in-law. Her name starts with J, but from the beginning she told me to call her Mom U. When her son asked me to marry him a lifetime ago, J embraced me and welcomed me to the family. She shows hospitality like no woman I've ever met, except maybe my Grammie. J can invite anyone to her home - a perfect stranger or a friend she's known for 60+ years. She treats them all the same and makes them feel like they belong, even when they are convinced that they might have nothing at all in common with anyone else who is there.

She cooks up a storm, as your stereo-typical southern hostess would, or if it's a small gathering, she makes a plate (or two) of little treats - my girls call them ma-ma-ma goodies. And there's nothing better than a snack of a recipe she's had in her family for generations. It breaks the ice, starts the conversation, and always leads to lots of laughter.

Over the past few years, our family situation has been a bit - ummm - shall we say - stormy. There's been a world of mess, hurt feelings. seemingly unforgiveable actions and harsh words. And through it all, J has still made me feel like I belong. That's no easy feat, let me assure you. She still welcomes me as if I am her daughter, even though there's now another daughter on the scene. She still loves me, and prays for me, and never hesitates to let me know that she is there if I need her.

She is filled with grace like I've seen nowhere else, and her home is always open, always welcoming. She has been an amazing blessing in my life, and one I am so thankful that has continued despite the marriage having ended. And this I know without a doubt, as much as she makes me feel like I still belong - she gives the same feeling to the new daughter. Because J serves with grace. She makes everyone in her home feel like they belong there. She has a gift of making folks feel welcome and loved.  And I pray every day that I might do the same.

So ... Thanks, Mom U, for being the example we all so desperately need. You are a gift in my life. And I thank the Lord every day that I have been able to know you, love you, and be a part of your family.

Love,
Jen

Exhale (Five Minute Friday)

It's nearly 3 weeks since I've written. And I am feeling the gap. You wouldn't think that 5 minutes of pausing wouldn't be such an apparent impact - at least I didn't - but 3 weeks removed from writing is starting to feel like simultaneously missing a part of my world AND starting over - jumping that very first hurdle to write.

I don't like it. And there have been some great prompts the past few weeks, so with out of order and very late fashion, I am going to catch up. Starting with this past week - which is not late yet.

*Read here how Five Minute Friday works in general. Feel free to write along. If you don't have a blog, just post your 5 minutes in the comments at the end of the post. Lack of a blog isn't an excuse not to write if you think you want to...   The link up for this week is at the bottom.

Exhale.

When I think of exhaling, I think of what happens at the end of a big decision. A tense moment. This week has given me lots of reasons to reflect on some of the biggest in my life. Choosing where I went to college (Anchor Down - proud Commodore here!)  Choosing to say yes to the man who asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. CHoosing to wait until that man was forced to face down the reality of his affair. Choosing not to fight him in court. Choosing to take the path of grace - for peace, for stability, for the relationship I dream he can have with my kiddos. Choosing to forgive. Choosing to believe there is a new path for me. Choosing to ask an old friend to meet me for an afternoon - wondering if it might turn into something more than a one time meet up. (It did). I sit here today and think of these choices - the paths I've taken - and I can exhale. With ease. For while they were not all easy choices, I know in my heart they were the right ones. I sleep easy at night without these weighing on my heart. I can stop. Breathe, and look toward the nezt step. The next tough choice, and while I might hold my breath when I'm making it, too, I pray that after it's done, I can sit back, exhale, and know without a doubt that I would make it again. That I can be certain I chose wisely. And I can breathe deeply with joy.

Stop.

PS remember one of the rules here is just pour it out without editing. So typos are welcome. Especially from those of us with stumbling fingers on a keyboard :-)

Link up with this week's writers here. Visit the one who linked before you. Leave a little love for the writers in our crowd :)