Lonely (Five Minute Friday)

Hello, Friday! I've just gotten home from a delightful night out with my brother. He's relocated to DC for fall semester (WOOOT!) and we caught the Nationals game tonight (complete with a Curly W!). Now I'm home, and it's time to write. Grabbing 5 minutes before bed and dumping my thoughts on the page. Five Minute Friday, where we write raw, unedited. And Lisa-Jo gave me a doozie this week. 

Here's how it works:
1. Go to Lisa-Jo's page, find your prompt. Set your timer, and then just let it all out for 5 minutes. No editing, no overthinking. Spelling and grammar and punctuation errors and all.
2. Link up with the gang.
3. Then go to the person who linked before you. Read the post. Leave them some encouragement. For that's the best part of Five Minute Friday - loving on another brave soul who puts raw thoughts out there for all to read. You'll make their day, and you just might find that yours is made in the process.

Ready? This week's word is LONELY.

Go.

It's quiet. I walk in the door, same as every other morning after I drop the kids off at daycare. But the quiet is different. This morning it hangs over me. Lingers. Because today is the day the girls leave for their week with dad. There won't be giggles and squeals to lighten my day when I pick them up. In fact, if it weren't for plans with my brother, who just moved here, and church on Sunday, I'd never have to leave my house for the whole week they're gone.

Working from home has it's benefits (schedule is flexible, which is a huge blessing as a single mama). But the drawback is it can get incredibly lonely. Conference calls fill part of the day, but not all of it. And at 5pm when it's time to quit, then there is only silence. I can work late into the night and not even realize it, as there's no reason to stop.

The loneliness hangs, loudly. Even though there's not a sound, I can hear the quiet pounding in my ears. A few days of a break, on the daddy weekends, is welcome. I can do the grocery shopping without help. I can read a book and stay up a minute late without early morning wake ups. But more than a few days pushes my limits. So I find that I'm embracing some bravery and venturing out on my own. To a ballgame, which is great fun. 33,000 other folks wearing red and looking for Curly Ws is great fun. And trying new places, calling a friend to make sure I fill at least part of my evenings with getting out in public. Fending off the quiet and forcing myself out. It's how I battle the lonely feeling that wells up as my kids hug me goodbye.

Stop.