One Word 365 Roundup (2024)

Dusting off this blog - at least for one post this year - seeing as how I didn't even do the 2023 roundup. I will get back to that... maybe... eventually.

But it seems fitting that as I wrap the year of connection, I reconnect here for that, and look forward to where next year is leading. Connection did not go AT ALL how I had thought it might. (Though I should not be surprised. Often my words lead me down paths I never expected). I had intended connection to be a year of writing a lot of letters, catching up with friendships I'd neglected recently, or for a long while, and fostering some better relationships with my kiddos. (This last part went ok, I think!) 

Instead, most of the year was spent working through two specific connections. One, where the end result is we let it fade. I've come to terms that the friendship was strong for a season but the season has ended, and that's ok. Friendship is hard, even at nearly 50, and working through the feelings of letting go is never easy. On the other side of a long year of reaching back for it, and re-learning that the ending of things is not always personal - sometime things just are, or need to be that way for unknown reasons - I am finally OK in this space. Grateful for the time we had. Forging forward with others. As I grappled, I was reminded through conversations with my girls... "mom, if this was my friendship I was describing to you... what would you tell me?"  And that perspective is just what I needed to finally let it go. 

The second was completely unexpected. Long ago, my ex and I split, and my girls gained a stepmom. Over the last 15 years, we worked hard with our unusual family to build a co-parenting situation that met the needs of the girls and made them feel fully loved despite our split homes and all the baggage that came with them. We got along fine, and I would even have said prior to this year, that we'd progressed beyond the space of only co-parents to some loose definition of casual friends. Not at all deep confidants, but more than just a hello at the grocery store type thing. 15 years of build a family will do that, and I've treasured how we've put all the "family creation" circumstances behind us and just made it work. Due to other things happening this year, our relationship took a turn, down the deep friendship path. Shared experiences, and a shared love of the girls and our commitment to show them how love works when people value each other, has solidified our now even more unusual family.  Current status: 2 moms, 3 kids, and 2 homes where all those kids are loved and know they are welcome any time. Different than what any of us would have said in January, but as we enter the flip side of this year, I think we both would say that this connection pulled us through to the brighter days ahead.

And as I reflect on the connections where my time was spent in particular, I feel that the work I had planned to do this year is left waiting to be done. And still should be done, and I feel called to continue what I had intended. Which leads me to the word of 2025. "Thread".  A repeat of connection didn't feel right, but as I think about how threads weave together to strengthen things, or can be tugged upon to unravel other things, perhaps that is exactly how this focus should look. Weaving growth and strength into places of neglect, and pulling a little to help the things that can depart fully be released without regret. 

-----------------------

**My OneWord365 History**

2012 - brave
2013 - grace
2014 - journey
2015 - wait
2016 - pursue
2017 - raw
2018 - listen
2019 - balance
2020 - enough
2021 - YES, AND

2022 - EMBRACE

2023 - soften

2024 - connection

2025 - thread

One Word 365 Roundup (2022)

We've reached the end of 2022. One year later, one more post. It's time to reflect on how things went this year - and look ahead to what 2023's focus will be.

In this year, my OneWord365 focus was EMBRACE. Embracing all the change ahead, whatever every new day brought my way. I continued my walk the year adventures. While I did not match last year's 3,006 miles, nor achieve either of my target date goals (2022 by my birthday; W&OD end to end in a day), I did get to 2022 (Oct 13, so a month and 10 days after plan), and I did figure out why my goal of the W&OD in a day didn't work. (The W&OD is Washington & Old Dominion Trail - a rail to trail path here. It is 45 miles from end to end. The distance isn't the problem, the training isn't the problem. The target of a weekend day when it was warm enough (but not hot) and daylight for long enough isn't a thing. Soccer games, lacrosse games, field hockey games. And that's just my parent challenge. Add basketball, lacrosse, band, soccer, swim, (and other things I am forgetting) for my walker partner kiddos... it's not happening. Mid summer brings (the occasional) free Saturday, but July out here would make us melt in the humidity. Not a good plan. 

On a walk today, it finally occurred to us that we need to do it on a weekday (when the trail is less crowded and the kids stuff is after school so they can sort of self transport or we can get them carpooled). April or May, or maybe September. Before the sunlight also wipes us out. With a coordinated, planned PTO day, I think this year we can make it happen. We shall try again. In the meantime, I embraced the reality that the goals I had set weren't going to happen as I had envisioned, and I dismissed any notion of guilt about it. Other things were more important, and realizing that was a key to this year. 

S, my oldest, is now 17, nearly halfway through her senior year - and what a ride it has been. She is awaiting college acceptance info. She jumped into that challenging arena with two feet and has fully owned the process. It has been my joy and delight to support her through the process. Support has looked like listening to ideas, accompanying her on tours, asking the occasional question, and cheering her on as each application has gone out the door. She's got great choices ahead of her. Now I am embracing the art of waiting (2015 was good practice for this) while the acceptance information comes in and then the art of listening as she reasons through to the landing place. My prayer is that she finds a place that she loves as much as it loves her back - where she can grow, learn, and thrive. 

A, my youngest, is now 14. She has started high school, stepped up into a leadership role on her travel soccer team and is currently in the middle of winter track season - a new sport for her. Embrace, for me, in this, looks like showing up for meets (and trying to understand the ... loosely organized chaos), cheering her on, a whole new schedule of practice pickups, and a new set of terminology. 

Watching both the girls grow, learn, work through challenges, while mama cheers from the sideline, and listens when asked, advises (mostly when asked, though they would tell you I also still do it occasionally when NOT asked - this plays right into my 2023 word), and hugs them through all of it. 

My dear friend Erika and I embraced a challenge this year - a girls only trip to Mallorca, where we hiked a good part of the GR221, met some amazing people, spent 10 days together away from our families, and connected like we haven't had a chance to since we graduated. 10 days away from work was a challenge. I have a wonderful team - they did an amazing job. I didn't check in, I didn't check email, I embraced the full brain break from work focus for the first time in I cannot remember how long. It was necessary, it was refreshing. Big win. 

And as we reached the end of this year, I embraced the need for a change in my physical health. Due to a long and twisty journey, this year ended with me having a full hysterectomy on December 8. I have been off work since then (will return in Jan) and fully focused on recovery and healing. There is work yet to be done here, however I am pleased to report that I am feeling AMAZING and so many of the challenges I was facing these last few years are already gone. I am back up and walking my regular distance most days, albeit at a slower pace for now, and can see so much improvement. I have also watched a lot of terrible TV, some terrific TV, read a pile of books, and been very mindful to focus on resting. The girls, neighbors, and friends all stepped up to make this work. 

The last thing I embraced this year was the ask from the kids to get our Christmas cards out on time (instead of for New Year's) and I am delighted to report 100% success on that. They even (mostly) ARRIVED before Christmas. A win!

As this year draws to a close, that takes me to thoughts of what comes next. While this year has been about embracing all the lasts (as S prepares to graduate) and the firsts (as A starts her HS journey), next year promises more - so much more - of the same. 6 months until graduation. 8 months until she starts the next chapter somewhere else. And A and I figure out what it looks like with only one kiddo here. How do we let go and let them grow, and yet hold tight and catch all the memories in the making? How do we celebrate the wins and also grow, learn, and give space for others to do the same? How do we do all of that while still remembering grace, kindness, and love come above all the other things?

That is where my word of the year comes in. 2023 is the year of "soften". Hold them close, but not TOO close. Teach and guide them, but gently, softly, where they can step up and do the doing on their own. Hold hands, cheer, support. But don't drag them through. Encourage rather than dictate. Celebrate without overwhelming. Love without smothering. Make the memories and allow them to make some on their own, too. Be there, but sometimes be the silent supporter. Let them shine, let them grow, love them through it all, and reflect it back. I contemplated "relinquish" and "release" as other options, but those sounded too harsh for the mission here. Not letting go of all the things - not hands off or shoving away. Rather gentle shaping around the edges, holding space for all of it. Cupping my hands to shield from the wind gusts as the first one looks to leave the nest, and as the second one starts to stretch her wings. A safe space to launch, and a soft space for landing when they come back.  

Soften - here we go.

-----------------------

**My OneWord365 History**

2012 - brave
2013 - grace
2014 - journey
2015 - wait
2016 - pursue
2017 - raw
2018 - listen
2019 - balance
2020 - enough
2021 - YES, AND

2022 - EMBRACE

2023 - soften

One Word 365 Roundup (2021)

One year (and a few days) later, I am right back here. Haven't written (here, anyway) since the last post, and maybe that looks different next year - we shall see. It is time, however, for the OneWord365 review, and the launching off point for the word of 2022.

At the bottom, you can see my full OneWord365 journey. It's been an adventure. This year brings the 11th time I am focusing on one word, rather than a pile of resolutions, and I am grateful for the growth each word has brought in its own time. 

Some have brought habits that have continued (example, the sink tweets that started with RAW in 2017, and are still here), and some have served their purpose well but are no longer in the forefront of my decisions. That's how it works, I think - some things stick and some things move along. 

Checking in on 2021, the year of YES, AND. There's enough binary decision making going on in the world, that the perspective of multiple things being true at the same time was much needed.

A few specific things I tackled: 

1. "RunTheYear".  My friend Leslie decided she needed to get moving with a goal this year. She texted to tell me about it, and I decided some focus would be great. but 2021 miles in a year??  Uhhh. Hard.  I said YES it is hard, AND I will try anyway. Signed up at Run The Edge (link in case you want to try with us). Please note, there is not much running happening here. There is a lot of walking! We added my friend Anna, who it turns out had been doing this challenge for several years already. Headed out on Jan 1, got started, and hit the first goal (2021 miles!) in September. Then a friend, who shall remain publicly nameless, challenged me to 3,000 miles by the end of the year. YES that is bananas. AND I went for it anyway. Crossed 3,000 yesterday (good grief that was a lot of miles) and have rounded out this year with 3,006. YES, I signed up for next year. Changed the goals a little; this is a mission I am keeping.

3006 miles total. Photo from a walk in the North Carolina mountains this summer.

2. Saying farewell to the Bob Feller Act of Valor Award Foundation. I feel so grateful to have been able to volunteer with this organization for the last 7 years, several of which included time on the Board of Directors. YES, I love the people, the work, and the mission.  AND with much reflection and prayer, it is time for someone else to step in and continue. I will miss everyone a lot. I still plan to show up for their events. It's still time for others to lead, and I know they will do an amazing job. I look forward to seeing where they take it!

3. Planning for a trip (scheduled for spring 2022). YES covid is still here, making things a challenge, wreaking havoc on plans. AND my bestie and I are targeting a girls' trip, to walk-about the island of Mallorca. Cheers to her husband, my girls' dad & stepmom, and my folks, who will be holding down the fort while we log some miles and time together. Our families were supposed to vacation together in summer 2020. This has turned into the mamas only, next year. YES, Planning and choosing optimism in the face of so much *gesturing* of all this is hard. AND we choose to try anyway. 

A few general day to day applications

A. yes I am still tweeting about my sink. and it is still as motivating and accountablity holding for me as it was when I started in 2017

B. yes metro still has rotten service/reliability. and it's still mostly better than me navigating parking downtown. 

C. yes, I wanted the Nationals to win more games. And my guy is a Barves fan, so he's enjoying the World Series outcome

D. Yes, memories last forever. And saying goodbye when a beloved friend dies still hurts. 

E. Yes, getting up early is hard. (note, when I say early, I mean 4:15). AND doing this so that the miles are shared with friends is worth it. The best conversations, and the best sunrises are some of the rewards. 

Best sunrise of the year. Ida Lee Park, Leesburg, VA

F. Yes, it's hard when your team trades away the players you love. And it's ok to welcome the new guys. And to cheer for your traded guys on their new teams. AND not everyone agrees with that last sentence. Which is ok, because this is my word of the year :-) 

G. Yes, raising teens is hard. AND it's also wonderful, rewarding, and heart-growing. I love my girls to the moon and back.

YES, 2021 brought a bucket full of challenges, AND still we found some bright spots. Vaccines arrived (hooray), the girls were finally back in school in September (hooray), we did get some time with my family this summer (hooray)! We took a quiet vacation to the mountains of North Carolina and enjoyed hiking, rafting, AND I conquered my fear of heights long enough to do a hot air balloon ride, which WOW what an amazing way to view the world. 

And now, with the final sunset of 2021 on the horizon (farewell, so long, I am done), it's time to look ahead to the new year, and a new challenge. 

2022 is bringing a lot of change to our world. I have one kiddo about to be a fully licensed driver, and she's starting the college exploration path, and she will be a senior. (HOW DID THIS HAPPEN). My other one will start high school in the fall. And with this last year ahead, I want to make sure I pay attention to what's happening. Both the changes coming and the memories we're making. The big and the small. With the girls; with my family; with my friends. Tackling some new goals (2022 miles targeted in a different way), taking a more deliberate walk through Scripture with some additional focus time there. 

I mulled on a lot of words before one made itself very well known. 2022 is the year of EMBRACE. Reaching out and wrapping my arms around my people, memories, experiences, goals, learning, and the future. Both literally (lots of hugs on deck) and figuratively (a focused effort to pray specifically for people, one at a time, and some journaling of the things I see/learn/do/feel. The gratitude journal has arrived). 

Cheers to the new year; may yours be filled with grace, love, laughter, and hope. Embrace them every day.

-----------------------

**My OneWord365 History**

2012 - brave
2013 - grace
2014 - journey
2015 - wait
2016 - pursue
2017 - raw
2018 - listen
2019 - balance
2020 - enough
2021 - YES, AND

2022 - EMBRACE

crossing the "finish line" of 2021 miles. Sept 16, 2021.
With walker buddies (and dear friends) Anna and Leslie

One Word 365 roundup

 Some other day we will get back to the 2017 spring break finishing. and the amazing 2019 world series championship from our beloved baseball team. And the years of OneWord 365 that I didn't publish.

(here's a history by the way)

2012 - brave
2013 - grace
2014 - journey
2015 - wait
2016 - pursue
2017 - raw
2018 - listen
2019 - balance
2020 - enough
2021 - (no I won't spoil it by putting it at the top. You will have to read the full post)

Let's start with how did ENOUGH play out for this year? 

I had intended to make this be an assessment of 
* am I doing enough (in the arenas of attention / engagement with my kiddos, growth and development at work, exploring interests I've long left by the wayside, focus on my relationship with one particular person, exercise/health attention)
* where am I doing more than enough - and therefore should cut back (in the arenas of volunteer work, leadership roles rather than helper roles behind the scenes)

Things started off slowly for my focus on all of these things in January. and then on March 11 everything changed. (that's the day my kids last went to school in person).  Enough took on a whole new spin, and rapidly at that.

I've spent the last 9 months focused on not the ideas I had, but also - what is enough with regard to physical distancing, wearing a mask, locking down before seeing family members. What is enough with regard to physical space - we learned that our landlords were selling our rental property that we were living in, and we moved. I am HUGELY GRATEFUL for a new-to-us place in the same neighborhood, with a fantastic configuration to support this work from home mama AND a space for each kiddo to do school at home. (Did I mention they are still school at home? They will be until the end of this school year. At least. I am hopeful that ENOUGH people will be vaccinated to facilitate a return to fully in person learning by fall 2021). I spend time each morning digging up enough energy to get through that day. 

We are weathering current circumstances better than many, and I am grateful for that as well. I learned we had more than enough stuff, so we did a wonderfully freeing purge when we moved. I was reminded that even as we mask up and stay apart, my village showed up to do enough of the heavy lifting to help the move be easier than expected. 

As for the volunteer time, that looks a little different, but I did assess where I was over extended and culled that back to be what feels like the right level of commitment for now. And made a note to revisit every year holistically, as well as every time someone asks for volunteers. I think this has been a welcome change.

As for the enough time invested in the kids - I think I struck a good balance of partnering with them in the new school-at-home-and-everything-looks-different-and-I-miss-my-friends-and-where-is-normal-mom situation, but not hovering too much. Though they might disagree a bit. (or a lot). They've grown a lot in their independence. Everyone takes turns cooking dinner (full meals with fancy stuff even) and doing dishes now. That's been a blessing - as it means I can put in my work hours doing the day, and don't have to go back online after dinner most days. Which in turn has allowed me to put some more time into reading - one of those things I love so much and didn't spend nearly enough time doing in the several years leading up to this one. 

And as every single day brings something else in 2020 (today there's a power outage in town so half of the teachers and school kids can't even log on to the school programs), I think we all want to say enough is enough, and look forward to the brighter days ahead. 

Which brings me to the word of 2021.  We all spend a lot of time in "either or" mode. Things must be one way or the other. If this one thing is true then some other thing cannot also be true. The world is not a two outcome place. Real life is not always either / or.  Therefore, in this coming year, I am looking at it from the perspective of  "YES, AND".  ( YES, I know that is two words AND there are no rules in OneWord365.) So often we hear "yes, but..."   I am changing the conjunction of focus to and.  

As we enter the last 9 days of 2020 - may you find enough love to carry you over the threshold to a new year, with vaccines, hope, renewed purpose and brighter days.  Consider joining the friendly folks at oneword365 and seeing if a word focus rather than a resolution focus changes where you might be headed. 

With love from here, I wish 2020 a (not so fond) farewell (and a swift kick in the pants for good measure) and  2021 a warm welcome. 

2021: Yes, and. 

Day 4 - Listen

I like watching baseball, playoff baseball in particular. Live at the ballpark is my favorite, but watching from home on TV is also fun for me. Even better than the watching, though, is the listening.

We are fortunate in DC to have a FANTASTIC pair of radio people - Charlie (Slowes) and Dave (Jagler). They really bring the game to life with details and then an array of facts and baseball trivia and interesting tidbits to fill in all the in between. 

I let the girls listen when they go to bed if there's a game on. We listen when we're in the car. And I keep the radio up and the TV down when the Nats are on TV here. Charlie and Dave are my favorite baseball companions. 

Late last season, the Nats did a giveaway of a radio lanyard. This clever thing is a lanyard with a small radio built into a reversible single headphone. The wonder of this is that with it, while you are live at the ballpark, you can put Charlie and Dave right in your ear, no delay. It lets you get the detail you missed when watching. It lets you hear what's going on when you can't quite figure it out from the stands (he was ejected? why? ) I also use it when I want to tune out the chatter from some folks sitting around me. 

I listen to Charlie and Dave almost every night of the season when I am not at the ballpark. This year I have LOVED being able to listen to them while I am live there also. 

I got my hands on a few extras - one for each of the girls. A used it while we were at the Wild Card game this week and said it helped her track stuff better as well. Big win all around for the added gift of listening to the radio live at the ballpark.

Day 3 - Problem

Today's prompt is PROBLEM.  And I have a problem ... I am drawing a blank here. Interesting. I usually reason so hard and through so many permutations when trying to think through solutions that I wear myself to the point of exhaustion.

Today - the opposite. My brain is off. Perhaps that's too many late nights in a row (thanks playoff baseball - YAY and too much homework on practice nights for the girls - BOO). 

I am amused - it's been a long time since I felt like there was NOTHING happening in my brain. Sure sign I need to go to bed.

Although - another positive of my lack of topical thought here, I guess, is that there aren't any major pressing problems in my inner brain circle tonight. That should make a restful night in a few minutes. (CHEERING!!!).

So, with that I'll say - glad I made the effort to throw a few non important words on the page tonight to keep the streak going. That will help me want to write tomorrow. And keep me on track for all 31 days.

Goodnight friends.

Day 2 - Gift

Last night was a baseball game here in DC. My favorite team playing in a one game winner-take-all Wild Card game.

with our friend K, (left) before the game

Baseball as I've often written is my safe space. When I need to reset my brain (redirect, actually) or when I need to do some hard thinking, I do it best at the ballpark.

None of that was happening last night. The whole night was super intense. At least for me. My youngest got to come along with me. Oldest had a game with her varsity team and she made the right (if hard) choice to stay with the team. 

the view from our seats as the Nationals celebrated their win

We trekked down to the ballpark, smooshed in our little Subaru outback with friends. We watched the ebb and flow of the game. The horror of the early home runs against us. The glee of the home run as we tried to come back. The middle innings of good pitching and NO HITTING.  And then as we were down to our final 5 outs, the tide turned. You can read about it and listen to the radio call. 

And after it had turned, and the crowd roared all through it - the loudest I've ever heard my ballpark in person, and after the last fly ball was caught, we exhaled. And we screamed. We cheered and high-fived with strangers. A playoff win. A move forward to the next round.

a bunch of my in real life Nats friends, cheering with the win! 

And the gift of celebrating it with real life friends and stranger but family fan friends. There is little that compares to a playoff win. And the joy that comes when you share it? A gift of a memory to last a lifetime.