Together (Five Minute Friday)

Writing for Five Minute Friday, but I'm going to break a rule today. The word is so fitting, and I refuse to impose the zero editing, five minute limit this time, as you will see in a minute.

Generally, we follow these rules.
1. Write for 5 minutes on the word of the week, and don't edit or backtrack. Just throw it out there.
2. Link up over here with the rest of the crew.
3. Read the post before yours and leave some love.

Rule #3 is the only non breakable rule. I will leave some love for my fellow writers. But this week, as I write on together, I won't set a time limit. And I will re-read what I write at least once, to make sure it's as right as I can make it. I will still have mistakes. I will still not wax eloquent. That isn't my style. But this week, Uncle John is worthy of a re-read, so that I can get as close to putting my heart in these words as possible.

Together

The word of the day is together, and the post went live Thursday night. Shortly after I received the news that Uncle John had passed on. It got me to thinking about the last time we were together, and the time before that, and some wonderful memories of times before that. Times that date all of my 37 years on this earth.

And last Thursday night at midnight the truth was still too raw. The emotions too overwhelming for me to even begin to write of him. And a week later, it hurts no less, but perhaps I can give you a little look at my Uncle John.

He wasn't even my uncle. Not by blood. Though in some instances, friendships might as well be family. And so it was with Uncle John. One of my dad's dearest friends since they moved into our little town around the same time, 40 something years ago. My little brother took his first unassisted steps in Uncle John's living room.

I saw Uncle John at the end of this summer, at my brother's going away (welcome to DC) party. And had no idea that would be the very last time we would be together. He walked into mom's house and hollered "Jennifer Leigh..." and you know, he's the ONLY person who has ALWAYS called me by both my first and middle names together. And it never sounded like I was in trouble. That's tough to do with a kid ... and an adult. And he gave me the big bear hug I would always get, and then he asked after my girls right away. He loved them like they were his own grandkids. He and Ann (his wife. We never call her Aunt Ann. She's as close with us as Uncle John was, bit we've always called her Ann. Just one of those things, I guess...) anyway - he and Ann came out into the back yard and scooped up my girls for hugs and giggles. They visited awhile. Chatted baseball, and politics, and football. On the same side in politics, and always on opposite sides in baseball (he loved the Yankees) and football (he loved the Giants). Fun rivalries and beloved times of discussion. They hung out with us for a few hours, hugged on us some more, and then were on their way.  "We'll see you at New Year's, Jennifer Leigh".

My family always has a New Year's Eve bash. Starts at 9pm and goes until .... well, the latest I ever saw us finish was 7am. But these days we hang it up more around 4am. No kidding. Ann and Uncle John always come over after the Lions' Club dinner. Which means we see them around 1am. Ann curls up by the fireplace in the chair dad always saves for her. And Uncle John gets a scotch and the stories begin.  So, we left off with they were headed down to Florida for the fall and we'd see them at New Year's Eve.

Except Uncle John had a heart attack about 2 weeks ago and never fully recovered. Mom and dad made it down to Florida to say their farewells and he passed a week ago today. How do you replace a presence like that in a room? You don't. You love on his family and remember all the fun you had and the great stories you will tell forever.

Like the time we all went to the Superbowl party sponsored by the Lions Club. The Giants were playing the Bills. They were ALL cheering for the Giants. But the Eagles weren't in, and I couldn't succumb to the pressure to cheer for them. Not my style. So I bought a cheap NY Giants T-shirt, and I painted one of those big red circles with a slash through it right over the logo. And I wore it proudly. And Uncle John got the biggest kick out of teasing me ALL NIGHT LONG. Fun times.

Or all the nights we sat in the dining room stuffing campaign literature for my dad's campaigns. They would sign letters and package them up and stuff envelopes. I licked envelopes and stamps until my tongue was fuzzy. For hours and hours, so many times. Dad was an elected official for almost 20 years. (I am rounding). We did a LOT of campaigns. Yes, I had a sponge to help with the envelopes and stamps but I always stuck my fingers together. So I was safer with a fuzzy tongue. Uncle John would sit around that table and tell stories all night long.

Or the nights the guys played poker in the dining room. I would sit between Uncle John and dad and look over shoulders and learn how to play. They all had different styles, but I would learn lots of hints, and they told stories all night long while they played. The nights of just sitting up to listen and learn.

So, as I drive home this weekend to say farewell to Uncle John for the last time this side of Heaven, I am blessed with wonderful memories of time spent together. As we carved pumpkins this week, my girls said "look, mama. Yours looks just like Uncle John with that big mustache." I took a look, and so it does.

I am thankful that my girls have known Uncle John. I am thankful for the blessing he has been to me, and my family. We miss him more than words can say. So we grieve this week with his wife, his children, his grandkids, and all of those who knew and loved him. And we smile with memories of time well spent. And his mustache - whenever we see one on someone else, we'll remember our beloved Uncle John.

our pumpkin with the mustache

Uncle John, Ann, and their granddaughter Samantha Jane

Uncle John with Samantha Jane (2007)